Thursday, May 1, 2008

The Peanut Mystery

Since I haven't seen Chip-Chip now for a few days, perhaps due to the squirrel plague, I decided to dump a little extra food in the garage. I placed about a cupful of sunflower seeds on top a plastic case in which the vast reserves of sunflowers seeds are kept.

Word of advice: If you buy a 50-pound bag of sunflower seeds (which is the only way to buy it because the smaller quantities can be several times the cost per pound than the 50-pound bag--seriously, I'm not joking), make sure you store it in a container that seals out moisture and little critters.

If you see a little hole in the corner of a bag, you've probably got a mouse problem. And where you have one mouse problem, you've probably got two mice problems, and where you have two mice problems, you've probably got twenty mice problems, until, eventually, you're overrun by mice. That won't be good for anyone. Can you imagine several hundred mice all lined up with a little cup in their paws demanding food? And if you didn't feed them? Well, could you imagine mice by the hundreds, organized like a rodent union, picketing your house? The size of postage stamps, their pickets might say, "Mice Have Rights, Too!" or "Small But Proud!" or "No Food, No Squeaks!" or "Free the Fleas!" (because a few mice are bound to be confused or get off task) or "These People Throw Away More Food Than We Could Eat in a Week!" or "And They Don't even Recycle!" It will be difficult to know which would be more embarrassing--having your neighbors know that you have several hundred mice or that you have several hundred disgruntled mice ticked off enough to expose your personal secrets. It's the stuff of nightmares.

At any rate, when I put the seeds on top the case, I added about 3 or 4 peanuts, thinking that mice probably wouldn't take the peanuts and hoping that Chip-Chip was still around. So I checked. The peanuts were gone. Not even a sign of the shells. (Mice would eat the peanuts and leave the shells behind; they're messy like that.) Yet the sunflower seeds were untouched. I added more peanuts. Again, they disappeared. Now, I'm reasonably sure that Chip-Chip is still around. He may just be in hiding until the grey squirrel population thins out a bit.

Or I may be wrong about Chip-Chip and the mice, in which case I've got mice on steroids capable of stealing off with peanuts. Such critters would pose yet another threat to Chip-Chip's well being.

Again, more evidence that life is not easy for chipmunks.

Something tells me I may be making things worse. If that's the case, I hope Chip-Chip is forgiving. Something also tells me chipmunks--of all the likely critters in the world--are a forgiving sort. Unlike the mice, it would be hard to imagine Chip-Chip carrying a picket sign.

Maybe it's all the free food.

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